Beating yourself up for any reason whatsoever serves nothing and is a waste of time.
There are so much pressure and expectation from society to conform, to be a certain way, to behave in a certain manner. It can suffocate your authentic expression. Sometimes, in an effort to improve, we end up being very harsh and critical towards ourselves. We impose unrealistic expectations and pressures given by those around us. We bombard ourselves with unkind mental chatter and self-talk.
Whatever you judge about yourself you reinforce. Judgment is simply a way to perpetuate the very thing you are judging. It keeps you stuck. Judging yourself doesn’t change the thing you are judging; it just tends to make it worse. Beating yourself up in order to get yourself to love yourself only creates more self-hate. Self-hate never leads to self-love. Beating yourself up in order to get yourself to improve more quickly actually slows you down.
Anyone can be loving in an ashram. Anyone can be loving to Mother Teresa. But can you be loving to yourself?
There comes a moment when, no matter how much healing or therapy you have done, how many books you have read or seminars that you have attended, you must make the bold choice to love yourself no matter what.
I challenge you to stop beating yourself up and start practicing “grace.” Give yourself the grace to let your self-have some time off from your self and your judgmental mind.